


The Light Behind Your Eyes

by stumblinginthestars



Category: Voltron: Defender of the Universe, Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Blood, Galra Empire, M/M, Post Season 11, hint at anxiety attack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-14
Updated: 2016-10-15
Packaged: 2018-08-22 09:50:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,675
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8281573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stumblinginthestars/pseuds/stumblinginthestars
Summary: Keith doesn't remember how long he and Shiro have been stranded here. He just knows that their time is up. The distress signal from the black lion had invited an army of Galra soldiers. And there were too many. Too many and Keith can't fight them all alone.





	1. Chapter 1

 

                Keith screams—it’s ripped from behind his bloodied lips, animalistic in every sense of the word—and slices his blade in a wide arc around him. It’s a haphazard, poorly executed swing, but it catches the arm of one of the Galra soldiers that had managed to get too close. Keith’s breaths are coming in too short, too sharp. They burn his lungs as the red and brown dust crunches under the feet of his enemies. He wants to rip his helmet from his head; the shattered face screen makes it hard to see enough to make a direct hit. But he doesn’t have time to do anything but keep swinging his sword, jabbing, parrying, and dodging oncoming bullets. He tries to breathe in deep and his lungs ache. The air on this planet was breathable, but just barely. That’s what Shiro had said when they had found each other. And now…

_Keith, if I don’t make it out of here…_

Keith’s left shoulder is slammed with a bullet he hadn’t managed to avoid. He steps backwards, nearly tripping over the prone body in between him and the jagged rock wall behind it. Shiro. He hisses, tears from anger and pain pooling in his eyes as another bullet grazes his armor on the left. He deactivates his sword, turning it into a shield. His head hurts, pounding from the lack of breathable air and stress and injuries he has managed to amass within the last hour of combat. The Galra are advancing on him; they know he’s cornered and alone and injured. He stoops low, making sure the shield is protecting Shiro’s limp form. His robotic arm lights up every now and then. Keith tells himself that it’s a sign that Shiro is still alive—still breathing.

He hasn’t had time to check.

A stocky Galra soldier’s claws grip the edges of Keith’s shield, yanking at the luminescent piece of alien tech. Keith grits his teeth, tightening his grip on the shield. He yanks it back enough only to jab it forward. It smacks the soldier in the face. Another soldier had come from the left and is aiming a lazer gun at Shiro. Keith changes stance, barely able to stop the shot. He leaves his right side exposed, though, and a lazer shot burns into his side, sending him sprawling atop Shiro. He rids himself of the shield. Turns it back into a sword.

This is it and damn it all if he doesn’t go down fighting.

He feels lightheaded as he raises the glowing red blade. A Galra laughs tauntingly as he looms over them and Keith swipes at him with the sword. The other soldiers—there are about twenty-three left—all take fighting stances behind the larger Galra. Keith supposes this striped alien is the leader of these troops. His blade slices the man’s armor, but otherwise, does no damage. The weapon is knocked out of his hands. It transforms back into his bayard, skittering across the rock-spattered sand. The captain raises a hand and his troops step back. He’s claiming them for himself. The needlessly massive weapon is pointed at Keith’s chest, inches from it. He’s so dizzy, but fights against the pull of unconsciousness. He isn’t going to pass out. He wants this soldier to remember his face—be haunted by it.

 _This is it. This is it._ His mind repeats in a millisecond. _God, Shiro, I’m sorry—I… Shiro, I…_

The loud, familiar roars of lions echo across the desert landscape before the yellow and blue lions come into view. Lance’s lion sprays ice, coating the entire fleet with crazy precision. Keith is too dumbstruck to wonder how Lance honed the lion’s weapon so well. Hunk’s lion crashes to the ground, smashing the Galra ice-sculptures as a shot from seemingly nowhere slices through the Galra captain who crumples to the ground in a mess of purple-black blood. Lance’s lion shoots back up into the sky, presumably to make sure no other threats were coming. Pidge’s lion shimmers into existence next, landing twenty yards from Keith’s rock wall. The small, green paladin races out as soon as possible, shouting through her helmet frantically.

Keith fights to stay awake, the adrenaline being sapped from his body. His body teeters, no longer able to stay upright it seems. He falls on his right side, breathing in the loose dirt that flies up. “KEITH! SHIRO!” Pidge’s cries are discernible now. She falls to her knees before the two fallen men, chanting a mantra of “oh my God, oh my God, oh my God” as her hands ghost over their bodies.

“Thanks… for… saving my… ass,” Keith grits out, each breath too shallow.

Loud, heavy footsteps draw closer and Keith blindly reaches for his bayard until he sees Hunk coming from the side. Hunk is no-nonsense in that moment, asking, “Keith, can you walk? I’m gonna grab Shiro. Pidge can help you if you’re able.”

“Yeah… I—I got it,” Keith grinds his teeth together as he uses his right arm to push himself to a seat again.

“Oh man, Keith, I can come back for you…?” Hunk says something, eyes wide as he stares at the dirt where Keith had been laying.

Keith looks. A puddle of something dark and reddish black is staining the earth. He frowns at it. “No… We have to… get Shiro- _hah_!” he winces as he wobbles to his feet. “Back… to the castle… fast.”

Hunk sets his jaw and nods, scooping Shiro up bridal-style before hurrying to his yellow lion. Pidge scrabbles up to her feet, steadying Keith’s swaying form. One hand wraps around his waist, the other presses against his chest to keep him upright. He clings to her, right arm around her shoulders as they trudge towards the green lion. “All clear! Let’s get off this rock rapidamente!” Keith can hear Lance’s cry from Pidge’s helmet. His had stopped working after trying to fight Zarkon.

Once inside the green lion, Keith slumps to the ground and pulls off his helmet as Pidge heads to the pilot seat. They’re off the ground, zipping after the yellow lion into the starry sky. His helmet rolls across the floor, thunking hollowly.

*~*~

 

Allura and Coran greet them with pinched faces. Hunk carries Shiro out of the hangar milliseconds after Pidge practically drags Keith into the main hall. Lance reaches out, taking the weight off Pidge. Keith grimaces, nausea rolling through his body from the slight movement, but fights the whine that wants to escape his throat.

Coran is examining Shiro quickly yet thoroughly, running the length of his body with a scanner of some sort.

“Hurry… and put him in… the healing pod…” Keith gasps, side and shoulder aching. His head is throbbing as well, things are fading in and out of focus.

“He’s… he’s barely there. My scanner isn’t getting any brain activity.” Coran mumbles, sounding faraway. Like he’s mourning a loss. “Even if we put him in a pod—“

“Put him in… a pod. _Now_.” Keith snaps, lurching forward. Lance catches him with a hand against his chest. It’s jarring and he gasps out in pain.

“Keith, maybe we should take care of you right no—“ Allura is saying. She’s staring at his side.

“DAMMIT! PUT SHIRO IN A FUCKING HEALING POD!” he screams at the Alteans, tears dripping from his eyes. The sobs are interspersed with sharp intakes of breath, gasps of pain. He feels Lance’s eyes on him, soft and blue.

“Do it. If there’s anyone that can pull through, it’s Shiro.” Lance says as he turns to face Allura, voice steady and almost authoritative.

Coran sighs, but nods and he and Hunk hustle out of the room. Keith sags in Lance’s hold, knees buckling under his weight and his head lolls against his chest. Lance grips him tighter and Pidge’s hands are on him, too. “C’mon, buddy, let’s get you into one of those pods.” Lance says quietly, bending to scoop Keith up. It’s not as effortless as Hunk carrying Shiro.

Keith whimpers when Lance gently lays him on a bare, white cot. He’s in the healing wing, sees Shiro is already in a pod. Coran joins them, hands moving to remove Keith’s suit. The left sleeve of armor is removed first, the Altean cutting through the thinner parts with a small, blue lazer. He winces as Coran pulls the sleeve off, jostling his arm. The armor had been shattered from the bullet and he works quickly and carefully to remove the shrapnel from Keith’s left shoulder. He turns to look at it and sees a large, ugly gash about an inch deep and three inches wide runs across the front of his shoulder. Bloody and ugly.

His right sleeve is cut off next by Coran as Lance removes his boots, leg guards, and belt. Coran cuts open his chest plate, pulling it off before peeling away the black undergarment from where it clings to his battered body. His side must be bad because he hears Lance suck air through his teeth and Coran pauses his ministrations for a beat, whispering Keith’s name worryingly.

“It’s not… that bad…” he says, their faces peering down at him the last thing he remembers.

*~*~


	2. Chapter 2

 

                Keith stumbles out of the healing pod and it’s cold. Bare feet on the cold floor. Cold hiss of air as the pod opens and he stepped out. Cold skin, prickling with goosebumps as he sways on legs as if he were on a ship at sea. He feels warm hands and blinks away the fog of sleep—was it considered sleep when he’s still so tired?—and barely registers Hunk’s face in front of him before he’s being smothered in a warm, soft hug. Hunk is sobbing, words broken up by happy tears. “Man! I—I missed you!... Lost and—Volcanoes! And—and you’re a-arm!... Can’t even have goop! Fixed your lion--! Misses you! So glad you’re back!”

Keith awkwardly lifts his right arm and pats Hunk on the back, still awkward with the whole ‘hugging’ thing. Hunk releases him and he barely has time to breathe before Pidge comes sliding into the room in her pajamas. She slides in her black and yellow Harry Potter socks as she tries to race towards Keith. When she finally makes it to him, her arms wrap around his waist and her cheek is pressed into his chest. She doesn’t hold on as long as Hunk, opting for a quick, tight embrace before stepping back.

“I’m glad you’re okay,” she says, swiping her eyes and pretending like she wasn’t tearing up. Her red-rimmed eyes betray her, though, as do the bags underneath them.

“Thanks, Pidge,” he says, voice gravelly from lack of use. “Ah, uh, how long…?”

“You’ve been in there about two weeks,” Lance’s voice echoes throughout the room. Keith looks past Pidge to see the Cuban pilot leaning against the entryway to the healing room. He looks like shit, the casual lean on the wall seeming like he’s just trying to hold himself up. “We’re lucky we got you—You almost…”

Keith waits, but Lance doesn’t finish. The sentence hangs.

“What about Shiro?”

It’s quiet in the room. And that same coldness seems to seep up through Keith’s feet and into his blood stream. He whips around, finally noticing the other healing pod to his left. Still up. Still running. Shiro’s dormant body still inside. He walks towards it, gripping the front of his loose, off-white top. He places his free hand against the glass sealing Shiro inside the pod. It’s cool to the touch. Leans his forehead against the blue-tinted glass.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers, only audible because of how quiet it is.

“Keith, it’s not--” Hunk’s voice is quiet, but he cuts himself off when Keith slams a fist against the glass pod.

“It is.” Keith seethes, shoulders shaking with self-directed anger. “It is my fault. He got hurt by pushing me out of the way. Because I was being… reckless and stupid.”

“Keith, that’s not your fault. Shiro probably knew the risk. That’s just who he is. No matter what, he always wanted—wants to protect his team.” Pidge winces as she corrects herself.

“He said…” Keith’s hands ball into fists, feeling the smallest twinge of annoyance at Shiro. “He said if he didn’t make it, that he wanted me to—to lead Voltron. But I think he was wrong.”

No one says anything and Keith hunches his shoulders. He sighs, the anger and annoyance dissipating as quickly as it had come and leaving him tired. He slowly pads out of the healing room, ignoring Hunk’s offer to join them for dinner. Ignoring Pidge’s quiet, reassurances. Ignoring Lance’s gaze—scrutinizing in an odd way. He collapses on his bed once in his room and wraps himself in his thin sheet. He closes his eyes, but all he can see is Shiro taking the brunt of the hit for him. Shiro smiling when he found him on the planet. Shiro’s lips, chapped and bloody, forming those horrible words.

_…If I don’t make it out of this, I want…_

Keith curls in on himself until he drifts to sleep.

*~*~

 

One week later, the alarm blaring overhead wakes Keith up. His heart lurches in his chest. It takes him a moment to become aware of where he is. He’s not in his lion. He’s not fighting Zarkon. Not marooned. He jogs out of the room, following behind Hunk as they head to the command room. Coran is anxiously twisting his red mustache as he paces in front of the large, blue holographic map. Three red dots are flashing on the map like blinking Christmas lights.

Allura is standing at the front of the room and saying something about Zarkon and Galra. But something is different. Keith’s been too numb to the world lately and he tries to wake himself up enough to pay attention. “…there are only three of them, so it shouldn’t be too big of an obstacle for us.” She finishes her speech, helmet under her arm.

Wait.

“Why are you wearing a suit?” Keith’s voice is foreign even to himself.

Allura gives him a slightly teasing sigh before saying, “I said, I’ll be flying the red lion.”

“But that’s my lion. Am I staying behind?” he suddenly puffs up, a flicker of his old anger sparking in his stomach.

“No, you’ll be flying the black lion.”

“But that’s Shiro’s.”

Allura’s face is sad for a moment. “You need to suit up, Keith.”

He starts pulling on a suit. It’s black. His stomach rolls as he clicks the chest plate in place. The blue lights on the suit seem loud. His head throbs. He follows everyone as they head towards the hangars, moving to the black lion’s. It’s strange. He gets into the black lion and the seat is a shade too big. The lion is too big. He doesn’t fit. He tries to calm himself down by talking to the lion. “Hey, this is—I’m Keith… This is just temporary, okay?”

The lion seems to be okay with this. The lights flip on, data screens pop up, and the sounds of his fellow pilots can be heard overhead. It’s weird not having Shiro give them a short pep-talk or some form of verbal encouragement. Keith is flying the black lion out of the castle when it occurs to him that he has to lead Voltron. He has to give the pep-talk.

He opens his mouth and an awkward, “Is, er, everyone... ready?” comes out.

Hunk and Pidge yell, “Yes!”

Allura’s voice is kind as she replies, “Let’s do this, paladins!”

Lance replies, “…Yeah?” The only one who seems to pick up on Keith's discomfort.

“Okay! Let’s form Voltron!” Hunk yells as he flies towards the black lion.

Keith looks out into the black, star-spackled universe. The Galra ships have just come into visibility, speeding through space like missiles. Keith’s breathing is short and choppy. He feels too small. The universe is too big. The Galra ships are too big. Shiro’s damn pilot chair is too big! His lion seems to feel his unease, creaking out an unsure roar as the other lions begin connecting to it. Keith’s hands grip the thrusters too tightly.

_Keith, if I don’t make it out of here… I want you to lead Voltron._

Shiro’s voice is in his head and his chest tightens. The last time he was in the black lion plays in his head. He’d limped from then out-of-commision Red to black lion as soon as Shiro had shakily landed it with a jarring crash. They had stayed in there, trying to get a signal for days. Shiro’s hands were gentle as he bandaged Keith’s ankle.

_Keith, do not go out there! Do not engage!_

_We can’t do nothing, Shiro! They know we’re here! They’ll get on board!_

The memories are wrapping around Keith’s chest too tightly and he can’t breathe as tears prick at his eyes. He hears someone calling his name over the connection. He opens his mouth, but can’t get words out. There’s a jarring burst and he hears the other three paladins and Allura make noises of surprise and protest. He scrabbles at his helmet. It’s too tight. He can’t breathe. He’s gasping, breathing too shallowly.

_My lion’s readings say the air is breathable, but it has a bit too much carbon dioxide for my liking._

“Keith? You okay?” Lance’s voice is loud and steady through the frantic babbling of the others.

“Why did we break apart?” Allura is asking at the same time Hunk is yelling, “Guys?! The Galraaaa!”

“I can’t…! I—I ca—can’t!” Keitghe gasps, unsure whether or not they can hear him between gasps. He rips off his helmet and starts clawing at his breastplate.

Lance’s voice is oddly calm as he addresses the others. “Guys! We don’t need to form Voltron to defeat three measly Galra ships! Pidge, you stay close back here and protect the black lion and the castle if a ship somehow gets past us. Hunk, Allura, let’s go. Use your bayards and focus on taking the ships down.”

Keith can’t hear any of this. He snaps a nail off as he pulls at his space suit. He can’t breathe. The top finally comes off and he doesn’t bother with his belt or pant parts. Just curls in on himself and shivers in the sleek, black leotard. He feels lightheaded. He knows, somewhere in the back of his mind where his sanity is currently shoved, that he’s not getting enough oxygen right now. Tears slip down his face and he punches the floor of the pilot room. He punches again and again, but he can’t keep it up.

The fight ends and someone pushes the black lion back into the hangar. Hunk finds him despondent on his side, eyes glazed over and unresponsive when spoken to. “C’mon, Keith,” Hunk is quiet as he helps him stand, leading him out of the lion. His eyes rove over the others and he feels a burning shame come over him.

“I—I’m sorry… I couldn’t… I didn’t mean to put you all in danger.” He chokes out, voice breaking in odd places and rough. He doesn’t know if he had been screaming or not.

Lance walks up to him and claps him on the shoulders with both hands. “Mullet-man, we are all fine. It’s fine. Just take care of yourself, man. Take a nap and we’ll bring you some food in a bit… okay?”

Keith nods, surprised by Lance’s lack of competitiveness towards him. He slumps to his room, but can’t stay there. He winds up sleeping in the healing room, wrapped in a blanket beside Shiro’s pod.

*~*~

 

“Keith?” A voice is faraway, entering the haze of his dreams. He scrunches his face up, fighting against consciousness now. There are several voices. Loud words, someone making the shush noise, laughter. He doesn’t want to wake up.

Whoever is talking, though, really wants him to wake up. “Keith?” A hand shakes his shoulder softly.

“Go away, Lance.” Keith growls in his sleep.

“Why is it always _my_ fault?!” the whiny voice of the blue paladin drags him further away from the foggy numbness of dreamland. “I thought we were tight now!”

“Wanna sleep. Wake me in twenty years. Or when Shiro wakes up.” Keith growls, pulling the blanket up over his head.

“Well, you better wake up now!” Hunk’s voice is loud and happy, completely covering whatever awful comeback Lance had been saying.

Keith’s eyes snap open and he gasps, “Shiro?!”

“Either that or you’re now forty years old.” The joking voice of the black paladin comes from behind him.

Keith whips around, seeing Shiro, Pidge, and Coran standing behind him. Lance, Hunk, and Allura were off to the side, laughing at Keith’s gaping mouth. Keith stands, trips over his blanket, falls, stands again, and runs the three feet to Shiro. He laughs, catching the red paladin as he collides with him. “Thank you, Shiro! You saved me and—and I should have listened!”

“I should be thanking you, too, from what I’ve heard.” Shiro’s hands are on his back and he can breathe again.

Keith huffs, muttering softly, “I’m glad you’re back.”

Shiro’s eyes sparkle and he smiles brightly at Keith, pulling him into a tight hug.

“ _Oh my gosh!_ Let’s leave them alone, guys. I think Shiro’s gonna kiss that walking fashion faux-pas!” Lance yells dramatically.

Keith smirks as Shiro babbles with embarrassment;  _that’s_ the Lance he was more familiar with. Pidge and Hunk laugh loudly at Shiro’s red face. Lance guffaws, bubbling out, “I’m joking, I’m joking! We all know that Keith is too emo for that!” Coran snorts at this, earning a pout from Lance. Keith blushes, but laughs all the same. There is laughing and crying and hugs and teasing and it’s loud and chaotic and Keith’s face starts hurting from smiling for so long.

But it’s perfect. It’s family.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading this, first of all. It's my first Voltron fic & I was going to keep the 2nd chapter shorter, but got carried away.  
> Second of all, I (obviously) suck at endings. All my endings just feel super cheesy to me. But I hope you liked it, nonetheless!  
> Third, I typed this without a beta, so if there's an error, let me know!


End file.
